Geerte Faas is also an employment lawyer at Institutional Affairs (BZ) and Human Resources, Health Safety and Environment (HR & HSE), as well as the founder and coordinator of the in-house mediation pool. Marise van Amersfoort is a programme manager and trainer in the field of conflict and mediation at the Centre for International Cooperation (CIS-VU). Arie Koops is also director of VU Sports Centre.
When can mediation help?
Marise: ‘When people experience difficulties in collaboration, strained communication, or the sense that their boundaries are being crossed. Talking about these matters is often difficult, because when people enter into dialogue, they usually already have their answers prepared. They want to respond and are more inclined to be defensive or even combative. Mediation offers people the chance to reflect on their experiences within the situation. It raises questions such as: What is your experience in this situation? Why does it affect you? What does it say about you as a person? We do this with both parties, so they gain a clearer understanding of the underlying issues and can work towards a solution.’
Geerte: ‘Sometimes people feel it’s strange to bring in a mediator, because they think they should be able to resolve things themselves. But when you’re angry or feel threatened, you can’t engage in a rational conversation or reflect properly. The support of a mediator can then make a huge difference.’
What do you do as mediators?
Geerte: ‘We help people to re-engage in dialogue, in restoring communication, or in finding alternative solutions. Mediation is not about establishing exactly what happened, but much more about uncovering the underlying issues. What were the intentions? What does someone consider important? It is on that level that people are often able to reconnect.’
Marise: ‘We always begin with separate conversations to hear each person’s perspective. Why do you want this dialogue? Why mediation? It’s important that people are intrinsically motivated to engage, even though they may find it daunting and may dread it. Both parties must feel that it is necessary for improving their relationship. That is why we always ask whether participants are willing to reflect on their own role in the interaction and whether they are open to making adjustments.’
Arie: ‘Mediation works on the basis of a few core principles: participation is voluntary, the conversations are confidential, and we do not provide advice. We facilitate the dialogue, but we are not there to tell people what they should do. It’s about the willingness to listen and to see whether that creates space for a solution.’
Marise: ‘The premise of mediation is that people take responsibility themselves and autonomously express what works for them. The underlying conviction is that when people come up with their own solutions, the outcome is better and more sustainable than when advice is simply given.’
Geerte: ‘At the start, we draft a mediation agreement, which also records confidentiality. That is important because it gives people the courage to propose solutions they might otherwise withhold. They know it won’t be spread through the grapevine, nor are they immediately bound to it. If both parties wish, the agreements can also be documented at the conclusion of the mediaition. This primarily serves to safeguard what has been agreed.’
Can anyone approach the mediation pool?
Arie: ‘Yes, all staff can request our assistance. In practice, employees and managers come to us directly, but also via referrers such as HR advisers, occupational health physicians, occupational social workers, and the ombudsman. Confidential advisers can also refer staff members to our services.’
Marise: ‘People can also turn to us if they are still unsure whether they want to choose mediation. We then discuss their concerns, what they might try themselves first, and what we could potentially offer. This allows employees to weigh their options and decide whether they are ready to involve the other party.’
What does mediation yield?
Marise: ‘As mediators we have various ways to frame a dialogue. We can look at the dynamics between people: what they trigger in one another, what their sensitivities are. We can also look at escalation points, when matters deteriorated into conflict. For instance, when people began discussing the other person with colleagues, causing ‘the culprit’ to be painted in an increasingly negative light. Talking this through often reveals that both parties experienced these moments differently.”
Geerte: ‘Usually it’s an accumulation of such moments, leading people to develop a certain image of the other and preventing them from seeing that person as they once did. Each incident contributes to a perception that may no longer reflect the other’s true intentions. Mediation helps to gradually reshape that image.’
Arie: ‘Mediation always brings clarity. What it delivers varies, depending on the willingness of the parties to search for solutions and to acknowledge their own part in the conflict. Sometimes it’s a great relief, and they manage to resolve matters through dialogue.’
Marise: ‘Sometimes people conclude that collaboration simply doesn’t work because they are fundamentally incompatible. Then it’s no longer about repairing the relationship but exploring alternatives. Mediation calls this the “best alternative to a negotiated agreement” (BATNA). Gaining that insight can be empowering, as it brings clarity and releases energy to explore other paths.’
How can mediation strengthen social safety?
Arie: ‘Social safety issues can take many forms. For example, bullying - when someone doesn’t dare to walk to the coffee machine if two colleagues are standing there. Or questions of physical integrity: how close do you allow someone to approach you? It can also involve irritations: one person feels shouted at, while the other insists it’s passionate debate. There are always two sides.’
Geerte: ‘Discussing socially unsafe behaviour is often complicated. Imagine someone feels unsafe because of another’s behaviour, while that person does not recognise it. As mediators, we help to make this more concrete by having people identify specific moments they experienced as unsafe or transgressive. We then probe further: Can you pinpoint what this is really about? How did you feel? Why couldn’t you speak up at the time and engage in dialogue? How did you respond? What was the impact and what were the consequences? We also help them envision the desired behaviour and collaboration.’
Marise: ‘When faced with inappropriate behaviour or a conflict, people naturally tend to avoid it - by fleeing or freezing rather than entering dialogue. That’s the biggest hurdle, yet also the easiest way back. At the same time, most people are not trained in saying: I experienced this as unpleasant. There is often a deep fear that everything will go wrong once the subject is raised. Yet I believe most people would actually like to talk about it. It is difficult, and precisely for that reason it is important that people feel no hesitation in seeking help.’
Do you see structural risks to social safety within organisations?
Arie: ‘At VU Amsterdam, faculties use a system of rotating leadership, where staff members temporarily take on the role of manager within their team. This can create ambiguity. The shift from colleague to supervisor may generate tension or confusion about roles, boundaries, and trust within the team.’
Marise: ‘This can also lead to perceived imbalances. For example, questions arise: why was someone chosen? Because of career success, or leadership skills? And how do others - especially those who previously held the role - perceive that person’s functioning?’
Geerte: ‘Not everyone is prepared for a leadership role. It would be valuable to better prepare people for such temporary positions, together with the teams concerned. The fact that someone shifts from being a peer to a manager - and then back again - has a real impact on relationships and team dynamics.’
What else could strengthen social safety?
Arie: ‘Training in communication skills is essential. I often say: align, agree - and the hardest one - address. These skills need to be practised by managers and teams. Not only retrospectively in feedback, but also proactively: what do we consider desirable behaviour? Skills around inclusion and diversity are also crucial, because they teach you to see situations from multiple perspectives and to acknowledge differences, whether of gender, age, sexual orientation, cultural background, or religion. At VU Amsterdam, this is embedded in education, for instance through the Mixed Classroom model.’
Geerte: ‘I think awareness of social safety has increased. The next step is to focus on how to act on it. That means training, for example in the BKO and SKO programmes, ensuring that managers are also trained, that students learn more about it, and that it becomes an additional component of the educational system. In short, it should be embedded across our community.’
